Friday, November 11, 2011

All Worth It

Veteran's Day, 2011.  We woke up early this morning because this is a day that Donavon has been looking forward to for a few weeks now.  His clothes are hung up from the night before and the house is still and quiet.  The alarm goes off and so does Donavon!  Off to the races.  Into the shower, and on to the rest of his routine.  Yet today is different from his daily routine.  Today is Veteran's Day.  He stands there in his tighty-whiteys, waiting for me to help him assemble the uniform that makes him smile from ear to ear with pride, his Royal Ranger uniform. 
We start with the basics.  The white T-shirt with the logo.  Then he slips on his pants and belt.  He pauses to ask me to make sure it is straight and tucked in properly.  "Rangers are clean!" he says.  Once that is assembled, he slips on his socks and shoes.  They have been wiped clean so that there are no scuffs!  He puts on his beloved bolo tie!  It's more valuable to him than a solid gold chain because he worked so hard to earn it!  He slips on his vest, stopping to let me help him straighten it.  I keep his Khaki shirt and beret for safe keeping, until the ceremony!

He is completely assembled and goes downstairs to get his breakfast and his medicine.  As I'm getting things put together, he quietly tells me (while bouncing a bit on his toes), "I want to do good at the ceremony so make sure I have all my medicine."  I smiled with pride and said, "Donavon, you will do great!  I am so proud of you!"  After eating his breakfast, we prayed and hugged as he went out the door with Daddy, to drive to school.

We all arrived together about ten minutes before the ceremony, just as Donavon was coming down the hall.  We gathered around him, Commander Ed, Daddy, and myself, and helped him get his khaki shirt on over his t-shirt, his bolo tie back on, his vest back on, and his beret centered and poised!  Time enough to take a picture and head into the gym!  I had a slight tear in my eye as he walked a little taller, with a big smile on his face!

The service was great.  He sat so well and even told us what he remembered from the service that we all had just observed!  The compliments, after the ceremony, came from his principal, choir director, and teacher with each one causing his smile to grow even bigger. 

For those who do not understand how a small Veteran's Day ceremony, at a small elementary school could do so much.  Let me tell you.  For Donavon, it takes longer to earn the patches the other boys are working on.  It takes more concentration and effort, on Donavon's part, to sit still.  It takes a huge amount of thought to make sure he does not soil his uniform, scuff his shoes or look disheveled in his clothes.  Donavon has worked twice as hard as an average child to earn every piece of clothing, every patch on his vest, and the pride that it brings.  But, Donavon has persevered.  He is proud to honor the veterans in this way.  It is his way of showing that, their fight for his freedom was not in vain!  It is his way of showing that he too can fight for what he believes in and see it through to the end, no matter how long it takes.  And that is what this great day was all about and made all the other days of incalculable stress, work, and struggles worth it!  The pride of a fight well fought!

To the veterans who fought for this freedom, we are eternally grateful and pray for you constantly! 

Monday, November 7, 2011

Another Day, Another Doctor



Another day, another Doctor it seems.  Donavon and I met his new doctor, Dr. Peter, a Neuropsychiatrist... Neurology and Psychiatry!!!  I was a bit apprehensive about seeing yet another doctor.  However, I got more answers today about Donavon and everything we have endured thus far, than I have in the 9 years of being his mother!

There are still a lot of questions to ask and find answers to, but God is faithful!  We are trusting Him to see us through. 

The goal through Dr. Peter is to not only regulate Donavon's medication and, hopefully scale back a bit to see less side effects, but also to see where Donavon's mental strengths and weaknesses lie!  It is exciting to finally have a game plan and a direction!

To all my prayer partners and intercessors, this is how we are praying...
  1. That God would guide and direct Donavon's doctors to clear and consice answers.
  2. That we would learn how to effectively interact, teach, lead, and love Donavon so that he grows and learns what he needs to be successful in life!
  3. That God would continue to cover and protect Donavon and heal him from HEAD TO TOE!
Thank you all for love and support as we continue this long journey!
 

Friday, November 4, 2011

10 Things the Parents of ADHD Children Wish You Knew

I was reading a blog, 'Beauty For Ashes', a while back.  The author, Shay, wrote an entry entitled "13 Things My ADHD Child Wishes You Knew".  She was inspired by someone else who wrote and educational piece, "10 Things My Autistic Child Wishes You Knew".  SO, the inspiration continues with me.  I have decided not to rewrite the piece but to put my own educational spin on it for all those who will be in contact with me and my family.  Here it goes.
*Keep in mind that these do not necessarily apply to everyone with children affected by ADHD.  Also, I am always open to talk about my son.  I do not get offended by questions when motives are well-meaning!*





10 Things the Parents of ADHD Children Wish You Knew
(the countdown)
10)  We have plenty of "advice" to work on and implement from professionals.  We do not need more advice from non-professionals.  We DO need support in the form of understanding, love, and prayer (and an occasional babysitter)!


9)    Be patient with me if I have to stop mid conversation to tend to my son.  I am listening to you and you are important.  I do want to hear what you have to say. 


8)    Do not try to talk to my child while I am explaining something, correcting, disciplining, or soothing him.  All you are doing is causing confusion, excess distraction, and another layer for his brain to decipher.  It causes more harm than help.  If you want to be supportive, simply reinforce what I have already said to reassure him. A smile is a great way to do that.


7)    My son’s disability was NOT caused by anything me or my husband did or did not do; It was not caused by anything we did or did not feed my son;  It was not caused by too much TV, video games, or neglect to allow him to play outside.  None of these things can improve or change my son.  They are all things we regulate in order for my son to have a well rounded, and productive life, however, they are not related to ADHD and it’s symptoms. 


6)    We (my husband and I) chose to medicate our son in order to give him the most advantages in life as possible.  This was not a decision we came to quickly or rashly.  It was a decision made after a lot of prayer, research, discussions with our pediatrician, and observation of our son in multiple social environments.  We are not and never will “settle” for the “easy way out” or compromise our son’s well being for the sake of convenience. 
*Natural remedies are not cure-alls either, so please do not tell me the benefits of gluten-free, sugar-free, or another "free" diet that will cure my son.  We research everything that we choose to use and weigh the risks and benefits with our pediatrician and other professionals.*


5)    Please do not compare my son to other children.  He is unique and special.  We do not compare him to other children because we do not want him to be ‘just like everyone else’.  We love him for who he is and we want you to get to know him and accept him because we know he is pretty awesome!


4)    I am human!  I get overwhelmed, frustrated, impatient, angry, tired, and emotional.  Sometimes, it all comes out at once, in various forms, at various people.  Please, don’t take it personal. *I NEED PRAYER too so don't give up on me!


3)    We are doing our very best to stay organized by using schedules, routines, and organization tools.  Some days are better than others but some days are simply chaotic.  If you decide to stop by on any given day, my house may or may not be immaculate.  Try to give us some notice so that we may welcome you into a straightened house!

2)    We are ALWAYS looking for babysitters!!!  :)

1)    All of the decisions that have been made were made with love, care, compassion, a lot of thought and prayer, keeping our son's and our family's best interests in mind and striving to do what is right.  THERE ARE NO SIMPLE SOLUTIONS!